funeral clothes

[adrian_turtle]

What with the pandemic and not driving and all, my recent experience of funerals is limited. My experience of funerals outside my local (very informal) social group is particularly limited. So I'm asking the rest of you, particularly midwesterners.

Do women wear suits to funerals? I know it's the kind of event where a suit is appropriate, but if a woman shows up in a skirt and sweater is that inappropriate?

My mom's twin sister lives in Columbus, which is too far away for my mom to travel in her current state of health. My uncle is in failing health, and yesterday morning it looked like he was about to die of pneumonia and parkinsons disease and stubbornness. Last night he started breathing better and we hope he will make a good recovery. But for a little while, I thought I'd need to rush off to Ohio right away to support my aunt at his deathbed until their sons could get there and then to be at the funeral and oh no what can I wear? It's wonderful not to have a funeral today! But I just realized I want to be there when the time comes, and support my aunt, and that will be necessary one of these days.

I don't know if I should wear my dark gray skirt and black sweater, or go shopping because nothing else fits? Most of the family has suits, because they're men, and/or because they spend significant time in formal business or social settings.

Comments

[conuly]

What's inappropriate is going to a funeral and judging what other people wear. The mourners are supposed to be focused on their grief, and the assumption is supposed to be that if somebody is dressed oddly it's because they didn't have the right clothes and were too busy grieving to buy new things.

You do not need to go shopping unless this is something you'd like to do anyway.

[evalerie]

I love you, Conuly! So much agreement here!!!!